Meat-free, Dairy-free, Gluten-Free, Oh My!

As many of you know, my health has been a bit troubled the past few years due to severe inflammation in my joints.  I have spent countless hours going to doctor appointments, surgery, physical therapy and having a battery of tests done.  All of this resulted in a 'best guess' diagnosis of psoriatic arthritis, with my rheumatologist saying that medication was the only way to ease my aching joints and all of the unpleasant side effect that came along with it. (I won't bore you with the details.)

The Art of Meeting Your Own Needs

Okay, so I started a 12-day cycle of medication last week to help ease my aching joints, and one thing my rheumatologist said has stuck in my head ever since: one side effect is that you will likely be crazy when you are on it. like crazy, crazy.  Um, okay.  Not the worst side effect I can think of, but certainly a mysterious and somewhat creepy one, if I'm honest.  But okay, I can handle this.  It's only 12 days.  Right?

Well, as far as I can tell, I haven't become crazy yet (or not any crazier than usual, ha!) and I am 7 days in, so that must be a positive sign.  What it has led me to do is get all up in my head in a different way.  A way that is related to my needs, or how to go about meeting them, to be more exact.

Over the years I have really honed in on exactly what it is that I need to be happy.  Body, mind, and spirit.  And though they are relatively easy-ish things to accomplish and incorporate into my daily life, they don't always happen.  Far less often than I care to admit actually. (anyone else?)

What Month Is It?!

Between both the greeting card timescale and that of a part-time freelance writer, I find it especially difficult to keep track of what month we are actually living in!  Greeting cards need creating at least two seasons before they are due to hit the shelves (often even sooner!), and freelance writing can often require planning for a particular season.

While this certainly keeps things interesting, it can also be hard to stop, take a step back, and appreciate this moment.  Once upon a time, I was a planner through and through.  Now, I am much more of a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants kinda gal.  The only conclusion I can think of is that the ways of my free-spirited husband have slowly rubbed off on me.  And if not, well, I'm blaming him anyway.  

I have, however, been trying to focus on living in the moment a bit more lately.  Moments where I am not thinking about what in the world I am doing with my life, the direction I want to take in my career, or whether I am saving enough for retirement.  So basically all of the boring adult responsibility type things.

This reflection may have been inspired by the life gurus we have seen speak over the past few months (including Sonia Choquette, Wayne Dyer, & Deepak Chopra), so I can't exactly take all the credit for this burst of inspiration.  

Here are some ways I am doing my best to live in the moment as of late.

The addition of this antique wooden crate/night stand, because it's just what my bright corner of the room needed!

DIY, because it soothes my soul... (big reveal coming soon - eek!)

A little picture frame makeover, because our bedroom walls are still bare... (this is the before)

These mirrors because craigslist finds make me happy!

This little reminder of Thailand, because I left a piece of my heart there, and because we finally put something (anything!) on our bedroom walls! (side stage right: another craigslist find from a few months ago, painted with my trusty chalk paint, of course!)

Cross country skiing, because we were excited about the arrival of snow! (though the same cannot be said for the freezing temperatures that followed!)

The beautiful Fall sunsets we get here in Colorado, because they really know how to brighten up a tough rush hour commute.

I love to sit and think about all of the little things I am appreciating at the moment.  It always brightens my mood.  Looking forward to holiday travels, seeing friends and loved ones (not mutually exclusive), and getting out of our daily routines at home.  Because you know we love to shake things up around here!

As I teased above, I should be posting a big DIY project (along with a mini one!) sometime after Thanksgiving.  So basically whenever I can physically finish everything!  I can't wait to show you!

And last but not least... who has decorated for Christmas already?  Am I crazy because I want to do it this weekend?!  Prepare for Christmas overload here on the blog in the weeks ahead.  The music has already begun!

Highly Sensitive People - According to Sarah, part one

{ Disclaimer: This is a post that I have been writing (and rewriting, and rewriting) for several months.  It is both intimidating and overwhelming to even consider pressing the publish button on such a personal post, but  I did make a vow to be open and honest on here, so... here goes nothing. Allow me to explain... }

Last year, I came across some research by a woman named Dr. Elaine Aron about what she calls Highly Sensitive People.  It caught my eye, as I have been known to be a bit sensitive in the traditional sense of the word.  I had no idea, however, just how much her research on HSPs would move me.  It is not just referring to someone who gets their feelings hurt easily.  It is how and why the world overwhelms these people that identify as HSP: because they have a much more sensitive nervous system.

The reason this is so intimidating to write about, is because I relate so much to it, but also because I worry I won't do it justice.  I am not a psychologist, researcher, or expert in any sense of the word.  I simply feel that this personality trait describes me better than I have ever been able to describe myself.  

So rather than trying to speak scientifically about Highly Sensitive People, I intend to talk about how and why I relate to this trait.  I also worry that everything I do will now be attributed to this trait and while I do relate to it on many levels, not all of it applies to me.  And it certainly doesn't mean that everything I do is because I, myself, am an HSP.  Yep, you heard right.  My good friend, fear, is holding me back from speaking more openly about this.  I am hoping that this post (and any more to come in the future) will generate positive discussions and compassion towards people that might appear to communicate, handle situations, or just generally act different to you.  Not just HSPs, but people in general.  For surely there are others out there who may not identify as an HSP, but as having another personality trait that impacts the way they move about in the world.

It has certainly done this to me.  I am much more aware of how kind and compassionate I am to both myself and others.  I can better understand the fact that not everyone thinks, acts, eats, drives, or communicates in the exact same way as me.  And that's okay.  It's more than okay, it's what makes this beautiful little world of ours so great.

So, just what does it mean to be a highly sensitive person?  Gosh, I won't even pretend that I can explain this as well as Dr. Aron, but what I can do, is tell you is how this trait affects me.  How does that sound? 

If I had to say, in one sentence, the best way to describe how this trait affects me, is to say that because I tend to be much more aware of my surroundings, and I take everything in, I can feel easily overwhelmed by the world.  When I say overwhelmed, what I mean is that I get overstimulated.  I don't only notice the general things in a situation, I also observe every small little detail about my surroundings or situation without even realizing that I am doing it.  Until recently, I thought that everyone did this. That I was normal in picking up on all of these seemingly insignificant details.  Turns out, that might not be the case after all.

I understand that this might sound silly, but it's important to note that having these heightened senses doesn't mean that you don't enjoy being out in the world.  In my situation, it is quite the opposite.  I love socializing, trying new things, and visiting new places.  All of which, quite often lead to over-stimulating my brain.  So as long as I have downtime after these intense (to me) situations, I'm golden.

Now, along with that over-stimulation, comes other side effects.  HSPs typically tend to feel more, and feel more deeply than your average person.  This is where the sensitive part is exactly what you would expect it to be.  I don't know if it is a result of the over-stimulation that makes us more sensitive to situations and people, or if it is its own unique part of this trait, but I will say that over the years I have been put into the box of being too sensitive more times than I can count.  And while I have always wished that I could grow thicker skin to hide this sensitivity, I now understand it in a way that makes me proud of my sensitivity.  Like its own little badge of honor.  It's who I am, it helps me have compassion for others, it allows me to truly feel my emotions, and, of course, to cry at work.  That last one I am not super proud of, and can honestly fill an entire post about HSPs in the workplace (or at least my own experience as an HSP in the workplace), but I will leave that for another chapter day.  

{ stolen from hubs... }

As much as I fear that I will be put into a certain box for being open about this trait of mine, I also have hope. Hope that if I can help even one other person to better understand themselves, that this public declaration and moment of (insane?) honesty will have been worth it.

So I will leave it there for today, allow it to percolate, restrain myself from going back and deleting the entire post before more people see it, and return with a follow up post in the coming weeks about my life with this unique (and totally awesome) trait.

If you are interested, I highly recommend Dr. Aron's book (she has many!), called The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You.  Even if you don't think that you relate to this trait, it might help you understand a friend or loved one in your life that does.  

Wonder if you, too, may relate to this trait?  Take the self-test on Elaine Aron's site.  And visit here and here for even more information.  There is another test for HSPs that are also sensation seekers, which I suspect I just might be.  More on that to come!

Okay, that's all.  Oh, and please be gentle in your comments...

I Hear You, Universe

Do you ever feel like sometimes the Universe is sending you a message?  I love it when things come into your life at just the right time.  Through life's ups and downs, I am finding myself seeking out all things positive to keep me facing the sunshine rather than the darkness.  This has led to me devouring any and all information that I think will help me in my quest to do just that, but also to better understand myself (more on that in a separate post next week!).  

Last night on the way home from my second yoga class of the day, I set my itunes library to shuffle and set off towards home.  The first song that came on, was a song by Kris Allen from a few years ago, titled Live Like We're Dying.  I have always loved it, but it was just the reminder I needed to hear last night.   Such true and powerful lyrics.  Even if you know the song, have another listen.  Maybe it will ring true for you, too.

The second song that came on, was one that I found via my favorite morning radio show.  One of the hosts of the show, Amy, has been open about her Mom's struggles with cancer diagnoses over the past few years. Her mom, Judy, has chosen to "choose joy" through her battle with cancer, even in the darkest of times.  She focuses instead, on brightening the days of other patients at the hospital and just keeps her focus on the positive with her situation.  Amy decided that her mom needed to start a twitter account, and searched for ages trying to find a suitable name.  @ChooseJoyJudy, etc. were all already taken, so she finally settled on: @JudyBePimpinJoy.  Ha!  Seems silly, but it really embodies Judy's outlook, and she seems to be enjoying the new (to her) world of Twitter.  So the morning show decided to do a "choose joy" (or "pimpin' joy") week in her honor.  It was all about getting listeners to do kind things for strangers, and it was AMAZING how many wonderful things were done during that week.  

A dedicated listener of the show, wrote and recorded a "Pimpin' Joy" song for the week (it's available on iTunes, and all proceeds go to the St. Jude's Children's hospital!  Go download it!).  Such a fun and uplifting song.  And another great reminder of what is truly important.  Here is the music video they made from the song.

The third (and final!) song that came on before I started to repeat these three songs over and over the entire commute home, was Loving You Tonight by Andrew Allen.  Such an uplifting song, and one that I connect with so much.  I am always excited to get home to see Chris and share my day with him.  After this week's post about my gratitude for having him in my life, it only served as an even bigger reminder to me.  Have a listen...

I guess what I am trying to say is, I too am choosing joy.  Yeah, I hear you, Universe.  Loud and clear.

♡ A New 'Sometimes' Series: Gratitude Journal ♡

Starting a gratitude journal has been on my list of new, healthy habits to start for a long time.  I love the idea of noting down things that I am grateful for, however big or small.  But I also don't want to force it by setting a specific day and time that these posts happen.  Hence the "sometimes" addition to the title.

Today, I am grateful for my husband.  It might sound like an easy answer, but I honestly cannot explain what a good, kind and honest person he is.  He knows how to make me laugh, when I am sad... how to bring out my silly side, even when I resist, and he knows how to really listen and validate my feelings better than anyone I have ever met. They say that relationships are tested in the hard times, not the good times, and I can say for 100% certainty that he is the perfect person for me.

So today, a very big thank you to him, for everything he has done and continues to do for me.  I look forward to life's ups and downs knowing I will have him beside me every step of the way.

I won't go into crazy detail, because well, a lot of it is private, and a lot of it I am sure you don't care to read about... :)  But I could literally fill this post with his amazing qualities.  I'm a lucky lady...

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Age is Just a Number

Do you ever stop to think about your gifts and talents?  No?  Ha!  Well, I do.  Or lack thereof as the case may be.  Don't worry, this isn't going to turn into one of those sappy posts full of self deprecation.  Well, maybe just a little.

My doubts about my own abilities is not meant as a pity party, but rather the sad fact that I don't feel truly gifted or talented at anything.  I am okay at many things, and that's cool, but is it enough?  And if not, how can I change that... or can I?

I lived a large part of my life being afraid to try new things.  If it wasn't something under my "safe umbrella," that I knew I would be good at, I would shy away from even trying it.  Silly, right?  How do you know you won't be good at it, if you won't even allow yourself to chance to try it?  Believe me, the rational part of my brain questions this on a regular basis.

My point in all of this, being that I might secretly have talents among hidden, untried hobbies and activities that I have no idea I'm any good at.  So dramatic, I know.  But I think it's high time I start pushing myself outside of my comfort zone a bit more.

I try to test myself and put myself through uncomfortable situations from time to time, because I know that I am capable of handling the discomfort, and that I will likely end up feeling so. much. better. if only I give things a shot.  But I need to do more of this.

Fear is a paralyzing emotion that can hold us back from living the life we wish to lead.  Simply because we are afraid to try.  Afraid to reach for our dreams, for fear of rejection.  Afraid to try out new hobbies, for fear that we won't be any good at them.  This is a big struggle for me, as I am not naturally a spread-my-wings-and-soar kind of girl.  I have to first analyze the danger, the pros and cons, and come up with a plan. Oh goodness, do I love to plan.

Sigh.

This post began as a post about my thirties, and I suppose it still is (can be).  This is something that I want to take with me as I enter my thirties in just a few short weeks.  Letting go, and pushing myself more.  Squeeze all that I can out of life.  No regrets.

Okay, stepping down from my soapbox now.  And here is the post that I had written and ready to post today...

{ Love this list of 30 things to do before you die (thanks for sharing, Aunt Jill!) }

As my thirtieth birthday approaches, I have been reflecting quite a lot.  Reflecting about my twenties and all that I have learned over the course of the last decade.  And thinking about the future, excited for what my thirties will bring.  I have never been one that is afraid of getting older, as I am always amazed at the progress and change that I go through each and every time I celebrate another birthday.

This post started (the original time!) as a way to reflect on all of the things I have learned and ways that I have grown over the last ten years, but I stopped half way through and erased everything I had written. Why, you ask?  Because it felt a little preachy and, frankly, even a little trite.  Yes, I have learned quite a lot over the years, and am so proud of the person I have become today.  But I still have so much to learn.  I honestly hope that I never say "okay, I'm good, I'm done learning, I like who I am now" and have that be the end of my ever-evolving journey of myself.  There are still so many things that I try to work on every day, in an effort to overcome, defeat, accomplish.

To be perfectly honest, part of me wishes I could move to somewhere like India for 6 months and really just focus on more important things than we are constantly surrounded by here in the west.  Do yoga everyday, meditate while enjoying beautiful scenery, and focus on my own sense of purpose.  Sounds idyllic, right?  I literally suggested this to Chris last week.  And not for the first time.  It usually springs up during particularly stressful times in our lives.

Chris always used to tease me when I would have these moments of clarity about life, using what became a coined phrase between the two of us, "just wait until you turn thirty."  As though that age had some sort of magical powers for unlocking the secret to life.  And though it is something we still often joke about, in a weird way, it's true.  Not the exact age of thirty, of course, but the idea that as we get older and have more experiences, the better we understand things and more importantly, the greater perspective we have.  

{ A fun list of 30 Things to Avoid Before the Age of 30, courtesy of Buzzfeed. }

I express all of this excitement about entering my thirties and swallow it with a big grain of salt because I know that as my fortieth birthday approaches, I will likely look back on this post and think, "listen to me, I thought I had it all figured out then."  And to be perfectly honest, I truly hope that is the case.  I hope I can continue to evolve and grow and become an even better version of myself each and every time I celebrate turning another year older.

Especially that monster we refer to as Fear.  I'm coming for you, my friend.

Here I go, embarking onto another exciting decade of my life.  Bring on the life lessons and, as always, the adventures!